Hey everyone,

Well, it finally arrived, a game I’ve been waiting over a year to get my hands on: Mass Effect 2, and it’s brilliant.

Though I’ve only been playing for about an hour and a half, I can tell you now that the sequel more than eclipses the original in just about every way, but as I haven’t yet written a review I can’t say too much without spoiling it for any future Commander Shepherds out there, so instead, here’s my top three improvements Mass Effect 2 has over its predecessor:

Number 3: Combat 

While Mass Effect is primarily a space RPG, the combat forms a large part of the experience. While the first game was decent, as combat goes, your squad’s AI was terrible, headshots didn’t work and the variety of weapons on offer was limited at best.

It’s lucky then that Bioware were careful to ramp up the combat for ME2, being sure to add more weapons, more powers and biotic abilities, smarter AI for your squadmates and, most importantly, a cover system which actually works- no more hiding behind half a crate for me.

With a smoothness which belies its RPG origins, ME2’s combat is a stellar improvement on the last game, and since I’m one for the Adept’s advanced biotic skills, here’s a little taster:

Number 2: Elevators

There was nothing worse in Mass Effect than battling through an epic shootout, blowing away Geth after Geth and saving the galaxy…and then having to stand in an elevator for ages as the next section of the game loads.

Thankfully the elevators have now bitten the dust, though the long loading times remain. Now, however, the time wasted waiting for the creaking Xbox hardware to build the scene is instead filled with interesting ‘Star Trek-’style datascreens, making those long waits a little more interesting, if not any shorter.

This cartoon really captures the whole ‘Mass Effect Elevator’ experience…

Number 1: The Normandy SR2

Anyone who has ever played an RPG can attest to this- Isn’t it the most incredible feeling when you are given your own mode of transportation, to do with as you wish.

Yes, be it Final Fantasy 7’s Highwind or Mass Effect’s Normandy, having your own ship kicks ass. Even more so when your latest model is a ramped up killing machine. So we come to the Normandy SR2.

Twice the size of the SR1, this new Normandy has more decks, more crew, more guns and more…moaning chefs in the galley. It’s also done away with the incredibly nimble Mako APC, instead replacing it with a nifty shuttle, and can even scan planets from orbit- so no more silly recon missions on rent-a-clone green-hued planetoids.

Add to that the ability to upgrade your own ship, take on loads of new crew and buy a pet ’space hamster’ for your quarters, and you’ve got a four-engined piece of awesome at your command.

Normandy SR2 - perfection in starship form.

To coin a popular phrase, Army of Two’s second outing, The 40th Day, is gun porn, pure and simple.

There’s little or no plot, the campaign is a little short and the enemies have all the personality of a bucket of concrete in a library, but it sure is a heck of a lot of fun.

So much fun, it seems, that my 40th Day review is sweeping the boards over at yourlocalguardian, holding the top spot in the most popular articles!

Take that, news.

Here’s my Army of Two: The 40th Day review, and here’s a trailer as well, because I’m nice. Also, if you buy it, add me on Xbox and we can storm Shanghai together

Words cannot express how much I’m looking forward to this game. So I’ll let this trailer do it for me:

January 28 can’t come soon enough.

Coming hot on the heels of another ‘action game’ this month is Darksiders, THQ’s apocalyptic hack-and-slasher starring none other than one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse, War.

War. What is he good for? Quite a lot actually...

A bit of a gaming gem this one. While it is likely to be dwarfed by the beast that is Bayonetta, Darksiders stands on its own as a brilliant little action game, though it is let down by its plot which, despite a brilliant set-up, goes a bit flat after three or four levels and becomes almost (almost…) as bad as an episode of EastEnders…

So here’s my Darksiders review, which is now online at gameSlave, happy lunchtime reading everyone!

Rarely does a game come along which can make me change my mind about a genre. Bayonetta is one of those.

Bayonetta, showing her normal disregard for the Divine...

Unlike so many other so-called ‘action games’,  Bayonetta is a pristine example of the best the genre can offer, filled from top to (ample) bottom with action, humor and brilliant gameplay, as well as plot which has more than the bog-standard ‘revenge on someone for something’ angle most hack-and-slashers go with.

And so here’s my Bayonetta review, online at gameSlave, and I’ll add a video below, which showcases Bayonetta’s ridiculous number of fighting moves! Enjoy!

Ah, the eponymous videogame hero. Ranging from the silent-but-violent Gordon Freeman, to all-emotion-of-a-pile-of-bricks Nomad to the wise-cracking intergalactic alien stamper Duke Nukem, they’re the characters who’s incorporeal forms gamers take over for a short time. And depending on the game, they can leave quite an impression on you.

Here’s my top three. And for the purposes of the article, I’m only including characters who have a personality, be it decided by the developers, or by the actions of the gamer him or herself (sorry Gordon…)

Cloud Strife

Number 3: Cloud Strife (Final Fantasy 7)

Best fantasy game ever? Probably. Most confused game character ever? Definitely.

Put simply, Cloud has lost it. At the start of the game, the amnesic, clone, massive sword-wielding spiky-haired one is a mercenary for hire, and by the end he’s saving the world in a massive crater filled with raw energy and the most terrifying baddy my 13-year-old mind had ever faced. Along the way he discovered his mysterious past, unlocked a number of beasties (which promptly destroyed half the planet), went into a coma, was turned into a puppet, and even indulged in…cross dressing.

Cloud Strife. Messed up, but still awesome. Even if he does look like a small stack of interlinked boxes… (the Advent Children Cloud was a wimp.)

Here’s a clip of Cloud in action, taking on his nemesis, Sephiroth.

Abe, looking confused.

Number 2: Abe (Abe’s Oddysee)

What can you say about Abe.

Even with his mouth sewn shut, the plucky little Mudokon freed his entire race, shut down countless factories owned by the evil Glukkons, got powered up by ghosts and possessed anything and everything that stepped within 30 meters of him, be it gun-toting Sligs or besuited boss-Glukkons.

Of course, it never hurt that once in possession of said unfortunate, you could then go on a killing rampage, or just walk the creature into the nearest meat grinder…

Abe, I salute you…

Possession is 9/10ths of the law…

  

 

Snake, as he was in Metal Gear Solid

Number 1: Snake (Metal Gear Solid series)

“Snake? Snake? SNAKE!”

If you’ve heard that before, then you know the joy of playing the world’s longest-running mech-opera’s lead character- ‘Snake’, the deadliest man on two legs.

Armed with his trusty sidearm and the deepest pockets ever given to a gaming character (seriously, how does he fit Fortune’s railgun in there?!), Snake can take on anything thrown at him, including Metal Gears Rex, Ray, Arsenal, Raxa and thousands upon thousands of Gekko, Tengu, Genome soldiers, mercenaries and boss characters, all without pausing for breath.

Then he will happily spout metaphysical conversation about the nature of love, existence and battle, before blowing a tank to shreds with nothing more than six grenades and his throwing arm (in the words of Otacon, “You’re…badass!”)

Everyone’s favourite clone warrior, and the last descendant of the line of Big Boss, Snake, I salute you, even if you can quite literally smoke yourself to death (cigarettes ftw.)

Also, if you haven’t already bought and played MGS4, do so now, it wraps the whole EastEnder’s-style storyline up perfectly, as well as being awesome.

Here’s a little tribute to the beardy, banadana-wearing one, which features footage from most of the modern MGS games:

Hi everyone!

I just wanted to wish all my readers a very Happy New Year!

I hope the new year brings health and prosperity, as well as many a challenge to overcome and lifelong dream to achieve!

As for me, after a year of hard work and the beginnings of many different projects, I’m going to use 2010 to continue working towards my ultimate goals (mystery that they are). I’m off into the city to watch the fireworks in person, rather than on the TV. If you’re in the city and you spot me, do say hi. A map of where I’ll watching the show from is below…

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Me. Seen from space.

A very Merry Christmas to all my readers, and thank-you for checking in to see my last post of 2009!

In a way, it contains a little bit of Christmas Cheer!

Firstly, while Lucasarts’ announcement on Spike TV was not Star Wars Battlefront 3, as I had hoped, it was instead this brilliant trailer for The Force Unleashed 2. It’s just a shame that it wasn’t Battlefront 3…

Also, here’s a link to SGR’s Christmas Podcast, starring myself and my co-editor Colin Miller, which features:

•Assassins Creed II
•Modern Warfare 2 (and “that level”)
•Avatar
•Super Mario Brothers Wii
•Lego Rock Band
•The Saboteur
•Doom
•Bayonetta
•MAG
•Mass Effect 2
•Medal of Honour (AKA – ”Modern Warfare 3″)
•Andy and Colin’s top 10 of 2009

And finally, because it’s Christmas, here’s a festive LOLCat:

Lol.

Merry Christmas, everyone!

After a spell of fighting off the dreaded man-flu I’m back in action, so apologies to those of you who logged in only to have to look at the S.H.I Tart below day after day.

So, to cheer you all up in the manic time as we had towards the long-awaited Christmas break, here’s a couple of treats. Firstly, my review of James Cameron’s Avatar: The Game. As you’d expect, being a film tie-in, it’s not all that good. I was surprised by the level of detail however, and if you’re a fan of the film you’re bound to enjoy it, even on the basest level.

Also, because I want to spread the love, here’s the spoilerific trailer I talk about in the review:

Also, it seems Hitler doesn’t like the look of it either. (WARNING- Bad language)

In other news, here’s my Left 4 Dead 2 review, which is full of brain chomping goodness. And if anyone fancies a game of the brilliant scavenge mode with me, why not add my gamertag: Bandit Mk2.

Have a great week, and remember, there’s only eight more sleeps till Christmas!

After a long, boring Monday shift, I came across this wonderful example of modern art:

S.H.I Tart, by Aunt Sponge, an entry to the Turnip Prize

Brilliant in every way isn’t it? And there’s more funny artwork over at this BBC article, which dives into the interesting history of the Turnip Prize, the terrible tribute to the Turner Prize (for artists who actually put some effort in).

Nice work artists! (if you can be called that…)

Oh, and here’s one of the more risqué entries from the 2007 competition.

Royal Wee, by Mustapha Aardvark (A jar of wee with a picture of HRH in it)... charming...